Ed Spots An Ultra-Fast Gig

The PM nods wisely when I say charging times are holding back EV adoption.

I now have a massive budget to promote a scheme to get these ultra-fast charging stations installed which can deliver 200 miles worth of juice in 20 minutes.

I call up the Permanent Secretary.

“We need to make sure the Department of Transport doesn’t try and get its hands on our budget to install ultra-fast charging stations,” I tell the PS.

“Absolutely Secretary of State,” says the PS.

“This is down to you,” I tell him, “take the Permanent Secretary of the Transport Department to lunch at the Travellers Club and warn him off will you?”

“I shall give him a steer,” says the PS in what I think is his idea of a joke.

Next I get Greaser on the burner blower. 

“Charging stations, Greaser,” I tell him.

“What of them Ed?”

“Do you have a subsidiary which could legitimately claim expertise in installing them?”

“Scunthorpe Transportation Logistics at your service, Ed.”

“Have they installed an EV charging station?” I ask him.

“No, but I suspect they soon will,” says Greaser.

“Bone up on it,” I tell him, ‘install a few for the council for peanuts and establish some cred. I’ve got a Chinese fella who can bring in the gear so cheap we can mark it up 500% and take a 75% grant off the government to install it.”

“Sounds like an earner.”

“So good I want 25% off the top.”

“You’re kidding me Ed, 10% of the net.”

“20% of gross revenues.”

“15% of the net.”

“20% of the net.”


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